Sarcastic New Year Phrases and Sayings

Here is a collection of sarcastic new year phrases and sayings. There are not many of them since the New year is obviously a day and festive moment which most of us love. But out there in the crowd, some people are gifted with a sense of sarcasm unlike others, and thanks to them we have this nice list here.

end of the world 2012

Honestly speaking, you ingest more junk between Christmas and New Year than between New Year and Christmas. Oh yea! ~Kurt Avish

May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions! ~Joey Adams

New Year’s resolutions are like opinions, they both tend to make you look like an asshole. ~Sarcasm Society

Happiness is too many things these days for anyone to wish it on anyone lightly. So let’s just wish each other a bileless New Year and leave it at that. ~Judith Crist

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves. ~Bill Vaughn

New Year’s is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions. ~Mark Twain

I made no resolutions for the New Year. The habit of making plans, of criticizing, sanctioning and molding my life, is too much of a daily event for me. ~Anais Nin

Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits. ~Unknown Author

Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account. ~Oscar Wilde

A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other. ~Unknown Author

The good thing about being a Taliban or Palestinian terrorist, is that there is no need to buy fire crackers. Just send the god-damn rockets up in the sky. The Americans and the Russians pay for these. ~Kurt Avish

The only way to spend New Year’s Eve is either quietly with friends or in a brothel. Otherwise when the evening ends and people pair off, someone is bound to be left in tears. ~W.H. Auden